If you a midlife woman you cannot get by with just having an OB/GYN on your medical team. Having just an OB/GYN during our childbearing years might have been okay, but as we age and our bodies began to shift and break down, so we need someone on our team who will be able to provide preventative care. “Patients who have and keep a primary care physician also have a lower mortality rate than patients who do without a primary care provider or who change doctors, according to a 2018 study published in the British Medical Journal.”
Your primary care physician can help with chronic illnesses, cancer and illness prevention.
Check with your insurance company if you need a referral. Do you have a primary care physician you love? Tell us why!
With Peace and Love,
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Older workers have been called names at work like old school, geezer, or grandpa, but many do not report these offenses for fear of rocking the boat and missing out on a promotion. But there are tools you can use to protect yourself against this type of discrimination. Your first step is to make sure that you are doing something you still enjoy, this is part of your mindful self-care strategy.
Keep abreast of new technological advances, if you need to, take a class at the local community college or library. Technology is here to stay, and we, as Midlifers, must be prepared to show that we understand it and can apply in our current or future positions.
Create your own gig, use your gifts and talents to finally start the business you have dreamt of, and become your own boss. Even if you are not ready to quit your job, having another stream of income will give you financial security and possibly replace your full-time income.
Get fit, we would like to think that our appearance does not matter, but the truth is that we are continuously judged by the way we look. Increase your self-care, workout, eat healthy food, and spend some quiet time mindfully thinking about your goals and dreams. Getting fit and increasing your self-care will boost your confidence and improve your attitude.
You might face an uphill battle when it comes to fighting age discrimination in your workplace. If you feel that you have been unjustly discriminated against, document the offense, and reach out to your HR department. If your HR department is not able to handle the matter to your satisfaction, the Age Discrimination in Employment Act (ADEA) is your next line of defense against age discrimination. This is a federal law that says an employer cannot fire, refuse to hire, or treat you differently than other employees because of your age.
The world may be changing, and others may forget, but you must always know your value!
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Midlife can be an exciting time, but it can also bring about some changes to our bodies, that can be hard to accept—one of those being weight gain. The problem occurs not when we gain the weight, but, when we begin to accept that this is just the way things must be.
To combat weight gain, we must do two things. Exercise and watch what we eat. The American Heart Association and the CDC suggest that 150 minutes of moderate exercise can work wonders to help you lose weight, build muscle, and increase heart health. If working out for 30 minutes, all at once makes you cringe. Feel free to split it up into 15-minute increments.
The second thing you must tackle is the way you eat. No one was more surprised than I to realize that I could not eat the way I use to when I 35. I had five babies, three of them are only two years apart. I ate whatever I wanted, and after the babies came, started back to running, and the weight literally fell off.
All of that changed when menopause hit, suddenly my belly and knee fat exploded, and I went from a size 10 to an 18 in a matter of months.
A study published in the American Journal of Health Promotion followed nearly 200 middle-aged women for three years, tracking eating patterns, overall health, and lifestyle. The researchers found women who did not change their eating habits as they aged were 138 percent more likely to put on about six pounds or more during midlife.
Eating healthy does not have to be overwhelming, watch your portions, and eat more fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins. Which means cutting back on caramel latte’s, French fries, and chocolate milkshakes.
I have been rallying the self-care flag since April. Like no other time in our lives, we need to focus on our well-being, or we will be swallowed by doubt and overwhelm. So, for August, I will continue to share a new tip that will enhance your self-care and bring you some peace. Midlife is not always the most secure time of our lives, but if we are intentional about taking care of our needs, it can be more comfortable.
According to the National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health, “meditation is a mind and body practice that has a long history of use for increasing calmness and physical relaxation, improving psychological balance, coping with illness, and enhancing overall health and well-being.” You can create your own meditation by sitting in a quiet place, using a memory that helps you feel more confident, happy, or brings you peace. Focus on memory and breath. You can also use a meditation app like Headspace or Calm.
Meditation is something you can do whenever you feel stressed or overwhelmed. As with anything, meditation takes practice, so do not be upset if you cannot settle down on your first couple of tries. Acknowledge the thoughts you are having and keep practicing. Do not worry about being perfect; be intentional on spending this time with yourself.
There was a time when you joined a company, you were expected to stay in their employ until you retired. But, that is no longer the case, especially as the pandemic continues to force companies to close or drastically reduced their workforce. Even in these unprecedented times, you must see your choice of career as a way of engaging in your self-care. Doing work that you love and find purposeful can be instrumental in helping you to reduce your stress. “Living in a world of ‘always on’ culture can wreak havoc on you physically, emotionally, and spiritually,” Amy Blaschka says in Forbes. “Constantly grinding leads to burnout, anxiety, and stress-related illnesses.”
So, what do you do when you want to change careers in midlife? It can be very disheartening seeking a new career path or even a new job within the same field when you a midlife woman. It can seem as though your experience and education are overlooked as employers seek to hire younger, less experienced, and less costly staff. But, there are things that you can do to ensure that you get the position you want.
Make sure that you running to something, rather than away from something. If you are miserable in your current position, you may gravitate towards anything that looks better. However, there are more beneficial ways to decide.
Any exit looks good when the building is on fire. You will be more likely to be happy with your career change if you take the time to choose the best field for you. The more you dislike your current job, the more critical it is to take a deep breath and examine all your options.
Avoid a career decision based on financial considerations. Of course, salary is a part of the decision-making process, but using it as the sole criteria can yield disappointing results. Money, even a large amount, probably will not make up for spending 8+ hours a day in misery at your job.
Midlife is not the time to take on more stress as stress tends to have more health issues, which are expensive, too.
Do not be averse to obtaining the necessary training and education first. Midlife is not the time to stop learning, do not try to change careers without updating your skills, and having the required credentials in place. You might look at volunteering or becoming a temporary employee to get the necessary experience. This will also help you to ascertain if this is the move you want to take.
When you begin the search, be sure to show yourself some self-compassion. Network with colleagues in your new field and ask for an introduction or referral. Do not practice negative self-talk; this will only delay your progress, speak kindly to yourself, and surround yourself with a nourishing support system.
Ladies, I hope you enjoyed today’s show. Remember that just because you are in midlife does not mean you have to continue doing something you no longer love. Be encouraged, and let your passion be your guide. Do not forget to share this podcast with someone you love and
The world is in chaos it is scary and a bit overwhelming. Before we get started, let us take a collective moment to breathe. Maybe like me, you have been holding your breath as every one of your body’s senses has been bombarded by emotions too quick to process.
So, I invite you, no, I implore you, find a comfortable seat, relax your shoulders, and plant your feet firmly on the floor. Close your eyes. Place your left hand on your belly, and your right hand on your heart. Take a deep breath through your nose, feeling the rise and fall of your belly and chest. Do this three times. Now, sit for a moment and just feel the awareness of stillness.
Even when you were not physically moving over the last 12 weeks, your mind has been in constant motion. I would bet you a butter pecan iced coffee that you are emotionally, financially, and spiritually exhausted.
Having been hit simultaneously with a global pandemic which has killed over 120,000 people in the United States alone, left 40 million Americans unemployed, plural police shootings which have sparked nationwide protests. Fueled by 400 years of systemic racism, brutal injustice, and downright disrespect of the human rights of black and brown folks in this country.
As women of a certain age, we have become very adept at hiding our feelings; after all, it would be selfish of us to spend time dealing with our own emotions, when we need to be the glue that holds our world together. So, we pack them away in a little box with the promise that we will unpack them later. Well, my friend later is now.
Feeling your feelings is not an easy task, believe me, I know. I am the queen of holding things in and telling myself that I will deal with it some other time. When things are not as hectic, when my life is in order, or when I have more time. I placated myself bingeing on Netflix, alcohol, food, and shopping. Until being unemployed meant that I had to let go of these vices and deal with my feelings.
At the end of a recent yoga class, one of my students exhaling loudly said, “I do not believe that I have taken a real breath all day.” Your feelings help you decide whether you are in alignment with your wants and needs. The scary part about taking that deep breathe feeling your emotions and identifying how they show up in your body is that you must submit to being vulnerable.
Being vulnerable can provide us with the key we need to live a full life. If we’re brave, it will allow us to finally let our guard down and open ourselves up to the sadness, disbelief, and frustration we may be holding on too, which means “more energy and attention we have to devote to our functioning life.”
Does holding your feelings in lead to emotional eating, shutting yourself off from family or friends, sadness, headaches, gut issues, overspending, or yelling at co-workers?
Your assignment this week is to sit in a quiet place, use the breathing exercise we did at the beginning to anchor your mind. This process will be as long or as short as you would like it to be, it must be done. At the end of your day, take out a blank piece of paper, set the timer for ten minutes, and just write how you are feeling. My free writing led to me address some things that I had pushed down but that needed to be addressed immediately, such as the daily emotional eating I had been doing to ease my frustrations. Once you complete the activity, shoot me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and let me know how this exercise worked or did not work for you.
You can conquer anything if you acknowledge its existence. The more we try to hide our feelings or put off dealing with them until some arbitrary future date, the more we will use unhealthy coping skills to bottle up our emotions. It is time to feel again.
Work with me privately. I am looking for 10 women over 50 who are looking, to lose weight naturally, reduce their stress, and increase their joy. If this is you, please fill out the form below. All eligible applications will be contacted by phone or email. Click here to apply! Your first call is free!
I get it, this was going to be your year. 2020 was the year you were going to lose weight, get a new job, disconnect from distracting or destructive relationships. Find your soul mate, really take hold of your self-care, and make it a regular thing. Maybe, you were well on your way to making this happen, and then the world fell apart, and you with it. I am here to tell you and myself that it is not too late to make your new life happen. You can still make significant changes to your mind, body, and spirit. Guess what! I have a plan to help us do it.
This plan is going to require us to take some baby steps every day because real change does not happen in a day; it occurs when we make small shifts towards what we want. Make sure that you hit the follow button so that you do not miss a post because, over the next couple of weeks, I am going to share with you 30 easy to implement life-changing tools and tips that will help you to transform your life. Real self-care is more than just getting a manicure or a massage. It is the culmination of everything you do for yourself physically, spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and financially.
Some of these tips may sound unnecessary, but hey do them anyway, remember it is the culmination of our efforts that creates real change.
So, let us start. Today, I want you to take out that massive goal list that you prepared at the beginning of the year, focus on one area, and create three smaller goals that will help you to complete the task. For example, if you want to work out every day instead of focusing on an hour’s workout, try 20 minutes. “Every time you set and achieve a goal, your confidence and sense of competence increases.” If you have been struggling to get your two-hour writing session done, then opt for 15 minutes a day, in a week you will have written 105 minutes that’s a blog, book chapter, short story, or podcast episode.
Setting smaller goals will reduce overwhelm and keep your life balanced. So, what do you say what area of your life will you focus on with your three tiny goals? I would love to hear about your success.
Self-care and self-love are so intertwined that, to me, they are the same. It’s hard to love yourself when you are not taking care of yourself. I know that we must take care of others, but real self-care is a conscious desire to take care of our own physical and emotional needs. We are about to start a new month. This would be an excellent time for you to set your intention and start or restart your self-care plan. Self-care is your superpower; without it, we are only half showing up for the people and things we love.
Your self-care can show up in many ways, journaling, meditation, exercising regularly, scheduling your medical appointments. The point is to ensure that your physical and mental well-being is at the top of your crowded “to do” list. When you do this, you can genuinely help others with an open heart. Otherwise, resentment will rise, and you will feel guilty for the genuine feelings emanating from your spirit. Because, self-care is your superpower!
So, take some time today and make a list of all the things you need to feel happy and whole. To have peace and live courageously and connected to the spaces you inhabit. You deserve it-give yourself permission to have it.
If you want to get a great night’s sleep. And who doesn’t, 😳📵😴try to put your phone (and tablets and TVs!) away for at least an hour before you go to bed, so your brain gets a break from the blue light, which can make you want to stay awake!
The world has gotten so gloomy. It’s important that we make a concerted effort to remember the good things. Because, while we are in the midst of death and dying, life is still going on. 📷🌆👶🏻What’s the best picture you’ve taken this week? Share it in the comments!
No Need For Masks Or Social Distancing!
I took this photo on one of my morning walks. It was cold! But, it was good to get outside away from the news coverage and smell the fresh air and see that nature is still thriving.